We've Come Full Circle

We spent our last full day together being us. I ate my last bowl of Anne's delicious porridge and poured in the right amount of milk and mixed the perfect of jam. I'm really going to miss my morning breakfasts. In the afternoon, we drove over to an outdoor marketplace and flea market  that I've never been to before. We walked around looking at the unique crafts then headed over to the grocers to buy a huge box of fresh strawberries and a bag of the delicious new potatoes that I've grown fond of! There was a big playground right next to the marketplace and Lassi was itching to play so he grabbed me as his play-buddy! I had no shame and I climbed on the play structure with him and led him around with my broken Finnish. It was one of the few moments I really fell in love with Lassi and that the language barrier didn't get in our way. Playing with him made me realize how much I would miss him. Even though he can be really crazy sometimes, I've seen how sweet and cute he can be. I really hope he remembers me when I'm gone because I'm never going to forget this adorable kid. 

Featuring a girl who helped swing Lassi. 

We played for a looong time. After a few protests, we finally managed to get Lassi off the playground and into the car to head back home. Lassi and I had so much fun together and I teared up a little when I remembered that it was my last day with my family. But I contained myself. Back at home, Nina and I started to cut the strawberries. Even Lassi helped a bit! And by "helping" I mean eating most of his strawberries. Anne and Mikko cooked fish and potatoes behind us and I was so happy that we were making a meal as a family! We ate outside in the perfect weather and my big brother Jesse even came back from work in the middle of our meal! I asked Jesse all my curious questions - like how to say bad words in Finnish. I learned a lot! Everyone laughed at my stupid questions but it was good, good times. 

In the evening, Anne, Nina, and I drove to the stable that Nina used to practice. There were two cats and two dogs who were the most cuddly and cute animals on the planet! But the two sheep that quietly stared into my soul were pretty nice too. But the moment I walked in the stable, I knew I would never work in a farm because the smell destroyed me. Some of the horses were huge and they kind of scared me with their gigantic heads moving around. So no countryside future for me. It was a great time though! Nina got to see her old buddies and Lassi got to pet horses! 

That evening, I said my farewells to my lovely American neighbors and the quiet but cool Jesse. I "said" goodbye, but it didn't feel like my last day. I fell asleep thinking that I'd wake up tomorrow to Anne's porridge and spend the day with my fun family.

Twinning!

My family was going to drop me off at the bus station so I could catch a ride to the Helsinki airport, but before that, we had to eat a great breakfast. So my family took me to the breakfast of my beginnings - the same place where we had our first breakfast together! We came around a full circle, but it still didn't feel like my last Finnish breakfast. It was delicious, as always, and I'll remember it forever. At the end of our meal, my family surprised me with great farewell gifts! They gave me a box of delicious Fazer chocolate, Muumi chocolate, an Niiskuneiti Muumi doll, and oh my - there was that Muumi mug that I've always wanted! Their thoughtfulness really hit home. My nose started running and my throat closed up a bit. I knew that I would cry at one point this day and it was going to happen real soon.

So the bus station. We waited for the bus and had little broken conversations. It was a little surreal. It just felt like another day. Even as we were walking up to the bus and loading my luggage inside, I didn't think I was leaving. When I hugged Lassi goodbye, he gave me a goodbye kiss on the cheek! I hugged Nina and Mikko goodbye and told them I would miss them so much. Anne hugged me warmly and said "I'm going to miss you! I love you!" Oh man. She really got the feels going. Finnish people speak sincerely, so when they say "I love you", they mean it with all their heart. I had so much to say to my family but I couldn't speak with my throat closing and the tears welling up. I wanted to say how much I would miss them and how much they meant to me. I wanted to say that I wanted them to meet my parents and sisters after telling them funny stories about them. I wanted to spend more time with them, but I couldn't say anything. I could only hug and nod. I climbed on the bus and instantly broke down. I quietly sobbed and finally realized how attached I've gotten to my host family over just a few weeks. And now that I was alone and they were going back to their home without me, I instantly regretted not appreciating my time with them more. The bus started driving away, and I looked out the window one last time and saw my host family smiling and waving goodbye to me. That killed me. There was nothing I wanted more than to run out and hug them again. But instead, I sobbed for a half hour with the crushing realization that my last moment of being a part of my host family had passed. The chances of us meeting up together again are good - I know that. But what made me cry so hard was the fact that I'll never be as immersed in something as special as being in their family again. My time with them was so invaluable and unique that I already know that I'll never have an experience like that ever again. But I can leave Finland knowing that we all had a great summer filled with laughs and smiles.

Two and a half hours later, I arrived in Helsinki airport and once again, it was like the American students haven't been apart. But this time, it wasn't all smiles. Some of the families said their goodbyes at the airport and tears were shed. All of us understood the feeling and most of us had just wiped away our tears. We walked through the airport while catching up and talking about how strange it was to finally be heading back to the US. Once we were on the plane, we got comfortable and talked the hours away. We wrote farewell notes to each other, signing our names with heartfelt messages to some of the best friends we've had. It's amazing how close all of us have gotten to each other over this short amount of time. Before I knew it, we landed in Washington D.C. After baggage claim and customs, we separated between those who had another flight ahead of them and the others who were staying overnight for their flight tomorrow. I said goodbye to some of my really good friends and almost cried. But we're way too close to say our final goodbyes yet.

The others who were staying overnight waited by the arrivals and we passed the time by watching families being reunited. I was looking through my iPod and I wanted to change my background picture, so I found this really great picture of my host family and thought it'd be a great idea to use that as my background. But when I looked at the picture for a while, I started sobbing and Ivy comforted me and became a shoulder to cry on. Just looking at their picture overwhelmed me with emotion and I might as well had jumped on the flight to the Feelippines.

The culprit. Why is my host family so precious.

After a long night, a late pizza, and a groggy morning, Will and I were on the plane to Detroit. When we were walking towards the baggage claim, we reminisced about our first flight together and arriving in Washington D.C. with a mix of emotions. Before we left for Finland six weeks ago, we thought that this trip wouldn't affect us that much. We didn't think we'd become so attached to our host family in such a short period of time. But boy, we were wrong. Now with out last flight together, we had a huge mix of emotions. It all comes full circle.

Now that I'm back at home, I finding the American accent a little strange from being around Finnish accents for so long. The roads have so many lanes and there are so much more cars. And most importantly, I miss the trees. In the suburbs, the nature is cookie-cutter plain compared to the diverse colorful forest-like environment in the Finnish neighborhoods. However, different country, different looks. Coming back home felt natural with my instincts, but my mind was still in "Finnish home" mode. My family and friends were so happy to hear that I was back home and we have so much to catch up on. Over these six weeks, I've learned so much about Finland, its people, and myself. As soon as I get a normal sleep cycle, I plan to search for study abroad opportunities in universities in Finland. At the very least, I hope I can visit Finland at least one more time and maybe tour around Europe. I'm confident that my host family and I will see each other once more. I'm so excited to talk to Lassi when he's older so I can tell him all about his four year old days! I really hope that the American students plan a meet-up sometime in the near future because I'm missing them already. It's been a long six weeks and there's so many funny stories and adventures to remember. I'm so glad that I've kept up a blog to look back on and knowing that I've had a great audience throughout my journey gives me a warm fuzzy feeling inside. Thank you for checking on my travels because it really means a lot to me! I've been saying so many goodbyes in the past few days, but I'm ready to say hello to the new opportunities that are ahead of me. Kittos, moi!